Bella's Monthly Gift
by This.Is.SCRUMPTIOUS
Summary: This is the exciting week-long tale of Bella Swan's time of the month and how she endured it. WARNING: Slightly inappriopriate and disgusting.
1. Day 1: The Beginning

**All females of the mortal world have experienced it, and every single one hates it. It causes girls to transform into something uncomfortable, awkward and...ugly.**

It's the deadly...

...TIME OF THE MONTH.

Haven't you ever wondered why authors never seem to mention when female characters get their period?

Have you ever wondered what would happen if a girl's started around her vampire boyfriend and family?

Wonder no more. This is the exciting week-long tale of Bella Swan's time of the month and how she endured it.

WARNING: Slightly inappriopriate and disgusting. May cause you to gag or vomit, so queasy people like that, please don't read this. 

It was 4:22 in the morning, and Bella was sleeping peacefully in her bed at Charlie's, dreaming, once again, of her vampire lover, Edward.

"I love you, Bella," he repeated to her once again.

The two of them were lying in the field as Edward sparkled before her. She was once again trying to convince him to bite her, and therefore turn her into a vampire, so that they could be together forever.

"I love you, too," she whispered softly, but knew that he had her heard. "That's why you need to turn me into a vampire. Then we can be together."

"You're right, Bella," Edward answered, surprising Bella. "I don't ever want to lose you. I want you in my life forever."

Bella was beaming as he touched her face with ice cold hands, tilting her head upwards and revealing her pale neck. He, too, tilted his head to reveal his perfect white teeth. The vampire leaned closer to her neck until he finally touched it. She waited for the teeth to break through, and the pain. She felt the pain alright, but it wasn't exactly where she had expected it to be.

There was a sharp pain in her lower torso, and she cried out. Edward looked at her worriedly, and his face began to dissolve before her.

Everything was disappearing. The field, the flowers, and Edward. Bella jumped up and screamed, but instead of finding herself in the liquefying field, she was in her bed, panting, and with sweat sliding down her back. Bella believed for a moment that she was still dreaming, for the pain was still there.

"Ow," she moaned painfully, holding her stomach. "What the heck is wrong with me-oh crap."

She slowly got up out of her bed and ran to her calendar. Yep. It was Sunday morning, the day that her monthly present began. She moaned again and began slowly slumping down the hall to the upstairs bathroom. Whipping open the cabinet, she was pissed off to find that it was seriously lacking the supplies that she needed, so she angrily closed the door and descended downstairs to the other bathroom in high hopes that there would be something there to help her with her needs. She opened the door slowly this time, in fear that it would be like the one upstairs; empty. But she let out a sigh of relief when she found that it had a bag with a few maxi pads resting in the back behind the spare rolls of toilet paper.

Once she was finished applying the supplies, she realized that she needed to now change her undergarments, and swore quietly under her breath. She trudged back up the stairs, which now seemed twice as long to her, and went straight to her underwear drawer. She pulled out a fresh new pair of panties and changed into them quickly.

She laid down back into her unkempt bed and tried earnestly to fall back asleep, but could not. There were fifty or so birds on the tree right outside her window singing loudly. She began crying out of frustration, utterly pissed off at her whole situation. Throwing her covers up angrily once again, she ran to the window, threw it open, and began yelling at the birds loudly, so that they all flew away in a huff of feathers. Thoroughly satisfied with herself, she returned to her bed in false hopes that she would return to her slumber. Her stomach made sure that she would stay awake for the rest of the night.

"Damn you mother nature!" she swore angrily, throwing the covers over her head. Although, she was secretly thankful that Edward was off hunting once again with his brothers and his dad, Jasper, Emmett, and Carlisle for the next two days or so. She usually didn't like being away from him, but she was just not in the mood to deal with him and his crooked smile and perfectness.

A/N: Alright, now this is a week-long event, starting today and should end either Friday or Saturday. I have yet to decide. Tell me what you all think! It gets a little disgusting after this, but how can it not be? Just write a review and tell me your thoughts. More chapters coming soon!

Day 2: Out of Supplies  
Guess who must go get them?


	2. Day 2: Out of Supplies

Thankful that she had finished school, Bella had stayed all day in bed, moaning in pain and refusing to talk to her father, who was found often pounding on her door and asking what the matter was.

One would think Charlie would be used to Bella shutting herself in her room by now.

She came down the stairs reluctantly the next day, still in deep pain and moaning seldom, to find her father in the kitchen, reading the newspaper. He jumped up at the sight of her in worry, almost spilling his fresh cup of coffee.

"Bella!" he exclaimed, putting down the cup and making his way over to her awkwardly. "Are you, um, ok, uh, honey?"

"Yes and no," she answered quietly still holding her stomach.

Charlie noticed this immediately and ran to the bathroom where the medicine cabinet was located.

"Do you need some Pepto-Bismol?" he asked distractedly, searching through the many bottles and boxes for the right one.

The girl in pain caught on to what he thought; he believed that she was having stomach pains. Not necessarily the case.

"No dad," Bella began, swallowing and closing her eyes, not because of the pain, but because of the fact that she knew she was going to ask him one of the most embarrassing things that daughters ever had to ask their fathers. "Dad, we need more..._supplies._"

She put special emphasis on that last word and raised her eyebrows at him to see if he would catch on. He obviously did not.

"What? You need more toilet paper?" he asked, completely oblivious to the entire situation. "Have you checked underneath the cabinets yet?"

"Not those supplies," she said, rolling her eyes. "You know, the ones for...that special time every month."

"Do you need to go grocery shopping?" he half asked half exclaimed. "If you need money, I have some here in my wallet." 

"I need pads, dad! Pads and tampons!" Bella yelled/growled at him, stopping him in his tracks.

His eyes grew very wide and his lips formed a giant, awkward, "oh." He cleared his throat nervously and wet his lips, not sure exactly how to carry on the conversation.

"Couldn't you, um," he began even more awkwardly, if it was even possible. "Ask one of your friends to buy some for you? I'll lend them the money and they could go..."

His voice slowly trailed off as he noticed the look of death Bella was giving him.

"What about Alice?" he asked suddenly, hope apparent in his tone. "She would do it for...you...?" 

The look had not disappeared from her face, and he finally sighed, surrendering. Charlie walked over and grabbed his flannel jacket, searching in the pocket for his car keys. He finally found them and walked silently out the door, not returning until he had come back with Bella's supplies.

Bella whimpered a little bit in pain, and returned to her bedroom. She collapsed onto her bed and tried to rest, but found she could not.

Charlie returned about half an hour later. He cautiously opened the front door, the only noise in the house was the ominous creak that the door made. He gently placed his car keys on the kitchen table.

He feared that if he made a single sound, Bella would come charging down the stairs and tackle him. That was the last thing he wanted. Charlie had some not-so-fond memories of Bella's mother during her days of…pain. They were not pretty. He hoped and prayed to the goddess of PMS that Bella had not inherited any of those traits.

But men are stupid.

He heard a second door creak open and winced. She was coming. She could sense what Charlie currently bought, and slowly, she descended down the stairs.

Charlie looked at the Wal-Mart bag, then up at the girl. She had a blank stare on her face, and the only things that moved were her legs.

Charlie had two choices:

Give Bella a friendly smile and hand her the bag.

Chuck the bag at her and run for his life.

He felt that number two was wisest.

He ran for the living room and tried to regain his masculinity by watching football.

**A/N: Poor Charlie. Ok, so this one was not as gross. But I believe day 5 is the worst, so queasy fans, continue reading to your heart's content!**

So what did you think? Did you enjoy day 2 of Bella's time of the month? Are you having a good laugh? Is this tickling your fancy? It better be. Stay tuned in for tomorrow's exciting adventure in, Bella's Monthly Gift. Enjoy!

Day 3: Homecoming  
Edward pops in on our emotional heroin.


	3. Day 3: Homecoming

There was a knock at the door around noon, and Charlie answered it, looking disapprovingly at the visitor.

"Good afternoon, Chief Swan," Edward greeted politely, a friendly smile on his face.

"Mornin'," Charlie greeted gruffly, smile missing.

"I'm here to see Bella," Edward informed him glancing in through the screen door. "My brothers and Carlisle and I just returned from our camping trip. I'm really anxious to see her."

"She's, uh, Bella's not feeling too well," Charlie told him, almost a little too happily.

Edward immediately grew concerned, his smile dropping to a frown.

"What's the matter?" he asked, voice dripping with anxiety. "Does she need Carlisle? I can call him, and he can make a house call."

He reached into his pocket for his cell phone, but Charlie stopped him by putting his hand up. He was trying not to laugh. He was thrilled to have a reason to turn Bella's boyfriend away. Edward was quiet for a minute and stared at Charlie intensely. Then his eyes grew wide in realization.

"Oh, I guess she doesn't need me," he answered quietly, trying not to reveal his knowing smile.

He turned around and walked away, much to Charlie's satisfaction. He closed the door with a large smile on his face, trying not to skip his way back to his newspaper and coffee.

Bella heard a knock at her window, and turned her head lazily towards the source, whimpering. The window snapped open and Edward crawled in. He smiled at her sympathetically.

"How are you, my Bella?" he asked calmly and lovingly, sitting down on the edge of her bed. Even a vampire like Edward knew not to mess with a girl in PMS mode. Especially Bella.

She looked at him miserably, and began crying out, "I hate my life!"

He stared at her, bewildered, and went to say something when she continued.

"I hate being a girl! Why did my dad have to have a girl? Huh? Why couldn't he have a boy like you? Unh..."

Edward slowly pet her hair back and began telling her to be quiet, or else Charlie would come in and find them. There was a roar coming from outside, indicating that Charlie had just left for work, and Edward allowed Bella to continue her ranting.

"I just want to take a knife and stab myself in the ovaries," she yelled, turning her head and crying into the pillow. "And I hate you, too!"

Edward stared at her, incredulously. "Why are you angry with me?"

"Because you're a vampire!" she exclaimed, peeking out from her pillow, fire in her eyes. "If you were a girl, this would never happen to you! Vampires are frozen forever! They wouldn't be in pain...like me!"

She squeaked the last part and began sobbing into Edward's chest, who was still brushing down her disheveled hair and kissing her head.

"And now you're here, seeing me like this," she continued through her sobs, grabbing Edward's now wet shirt and tugging on it, bringing his head close to her neck. "Bite me! Just bite me now! Please!"

Edward grimaced. He hated when Bella asked him to turn her into a vampire, and seeing her like this made the situation ten times worse.

"You are in an emotional frenzy right now," he told her calmly, and immediately wished he hadn't, for she looked up at him with murder in her eyes. "You are not thinking straight. This will all blow over in a few days. For now, just try to relax."

Everything he said meant nothing to her. She was stuck at, "emotional frenzy." Bella slowly crawled away from him to the opposite side of her bed.

"Emotional _frenzy?" _she growled angrily at him, an almost wild look in her eyes. "Emotional frenzy? !"

Edward figured that this was as good a time as any to leave her. He felt that anything he said would be turned around and made into something bigger than it really was. He slowly stood up and began exiting out the window that he had entered from. Then she began calling out to him pitifully.

"Don't leave," she cried, her face growing soft. "I, I want you here. I'm sorry..."

Her voice drifted off and she began crying again. Edward returned to her side almost immediately.

"Besides, my love," Edward began, tilting her chin up so that he could look into her pained, watery eyes. "When you turn into a vampire, your body is frozen forever. It's possible that you could just keep bleeding forever."

He knew it was a lie, but he knew that Bella was not quite herself this morning, and was hoping that it would prevent her from asking again.

Bella looked at him again, coldly. She demanded that he go on a chocolate and Midol run. He wished he had gone home.

**A/N: DISCLAIMERS: I do not own Midol. Well, I do in fact OWN it, in a literal sense, but in a figurative sense, someone invented and that someone was not me. Unfortunately. **

**Oh, I also do not own Wal-Mart. **

**So Edward Cullen made an appearance. Cheers for all you Edward fans, and Jacob fans, I apologize. I myself am a Jacob fan. Don't worry, you will see our wonderfully bronzed and buff friend soon enough.**

Day 4: Swimming in La Push  
Bella's school friends want to take her swimming. Cue laugh track.


	4. Day 4: Swimming in La Push

Bella did not know why she had agreed to go with her school friends to the beach at La Push, but she assumed that it was because she just wanted to get out of the house. Or perhaps it was PMS messing with her emotions again. Either way, she was even more surprised when Edward had let her go; he normally didn't like her going into the wolves' territory, mainly because he could not cross over and save her if she needed it. Instead, he told her it was alright and was awaiting her faithfully at the treaty borderline with a good book.

"You aren't going to go swimming, Bella?" Mike asked her, disappointment just screaming off of his face.

Someone wanted to see her in a swim suit. Preferably a bikini.

Bella looked up into the beautiful sunny day. It was rare when there was weather like this, and boy did she enjoy the warm sun. Of course, it was nothing like her old home in Phoenix where it was quite the opposite of Washington, but that was why this moment was special to her, because of how rare it was.

"No," she answered after a minute, trying to be as vague as possible. She didn't want these people to know about her little, er, problem. "I'm not a very good swimmer."

"You can just swim along the shallow ends," Angela suggested, earning her a glare from Bella.

"Maybe I'll walk around with my shoes off or something," Bella said with a shrug, tugging her coat closer to her, despite the warmer weather.

Mike smiled at her, but ran towards the water after Jessica had thrown a water balloon at him. Bella never understood why those two never got together. Sure, it was obvious that Mike liked her, but it was also quite obvious that Jessica liked Mike. They even went to prom together.

Just as she promised, Bella took her shoes off and set them aside on a nearby algae-infested rock. She dipped her toe in slightly, and found that the water was a little chilly, but not bad. Submerging both of her feet in the water, Bella began walking around and squishing the wet sand in-between her toes.

She was happy, despite not having her love here next to her, because of how much better she felt. The past three days had been hell to her, the worst she had ever had in her entire life. Right now was a little mini-vacation for her, and she was completely satisfied. Nothing could ruin this right now…

…Until Mike picked her up and, despite her protests, dumped her into the chilly water, soaking her entire body. And worse.

Mike was giving Eric a high-five, who was chuckling right along with him like a couple of immature, and stupid, five year olds. Bella's head popped out of the water, and she was gasping for air; not because she was under for long, but because she was so surprised. Her jaw clenched and she slowly turned her head towards the two laughing baboons. The two stopped laughing immediately.

"Oh my god, SHE'S PISSED! RUN!" Eric yelled at the top of his lungs with fear in his eyes.

Mike and Eric took off running into deeper waters, knowing that she would not go after them out there. Seeing that there was nothing she could do, she stood up and left the beach with as much dignity as she could muster.

Edward held open the door of his silver Volvo for her, with his crooked smile on his face. It was apparent that he was trying not to laugh.

He closed the door behind her and got in on his side. It took him a minute before he could start the car.

"Do you want to dry off first?" he asked her, jingling the keys in his hands. "Because these are leather seats and-"

"Drive."

**A/N: Sorry about the delay…the past couple of days have been hectic. I had to help plan my younger sisters' graduation party. They're twins. After that I had to help participate in the party, clean up, and the next day was recovery. So sorry dear fans!**

**Yeah, I know. This was a short one. But I really didn't think that there should be much to this chapter. Bella really doesn't like her friends that much. Well, not so much that she doesn't like them, it's that she's too awkward to have normal friends. Besides, it would not have ended on such a funny note if I had not left it here.**

So no one's noticed that Bella is a little OC in this story. And I'm glad. I was afraid that someone was going to flame me and say, 'Bella is totally not like that! What's wrong with you?' Well to people who are thinking that I say, 'Have you ever been yourself whilst PMSing?' And to all you dudes out there thinking this, have you ever met a girl who was normal during PMS? Yeah, I didn't think so. But I will admit that I did exagerate her symptoms a bit. I did it on purpose. Bella is such a 2-Dimensional character that I figured it would be fun to make her a little crazy. And oh yeah it totally is.

So tell me what you thought of today's chapter. Was it funny? Dumb? Terribly written? Etc? Leave a comment!

Day 5: Dinner with the Cullens  
The chapter you've all been waiting for. Who's the one vampire that gets a little excited over blood?


	5. Day 5: Dinner with the Cullens

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Edward asked eagerly, holding open the door cautiously, unsure of what kind of mood she would be in tonight.

"Yes, of course I'm sure!" Bella answered happily, hitting him slightly with her purse. Her bright mood was unusual, and unnerving. "I love your family! And they are going to be my family soon, anyway."

The Cullens had invited Bella over for dinner at the home, and Bella had agreed, sounding strangely and overly happy about it.

Bella jumped out of her beloved truck and Edward, like a true gentleman, closed it behind her. She eagerly took his arm and together they walked up to Edward's house. She had been smiling at him the entire time, and it had been unsettling. Bella never smiled. And her current one was beginning to creep him out. He felt more at ease when they both wore matching grimaces.

She skipped into the living room, humming to herself, as Edward walked stiffly in. Then she stopped, releasing Edward from her overjoyed grip, and held her arms open. In a second, they were filled with the little form of Alice Cullen.

"Alice!" Bella exclaimed joyfully. "It's so good to see you!"

"You are really happy today, Bella," Alice said slowly, pulling away from Bella and narrowing her eyes. "What's the matter?"

"Let's go into the kitchen, Belles," Edward interrupted, leading her to where the smell of chicken was emanating from.

"Edward?" Alice asked, then her eyes sort of glazed over, and Edward knew that she was seeing into the future. She stopped and smiled. "Are you sure it's safe for her to be over here?"

"You tell me," he answered, knowing that she had seen something amusing, but she wouldn't let him inside of her mind.

"Let's just say, this evening is going to be _very_ amusing." She skipped away to the kitchen and helped set the table. "I'm just worried about Jasper now."

He had nothing to say to her last, enigmatic sentence.

In the kitchen, Esme was at the counter, organizing the one piece of chicken on the one plate, the one that belonged to Bella. She wanted to make it look perfect. She sprinkled some sort of green herb over it, and put a side of corn and carrots on the one right side of the plate. She turned around and smiled.

"Hello Bella," she greeted warmly. "Dinner's almost ready. Please, take a seat."

Everyone sat in a chair, but only Bella had food on her plate. They were just having a small conversation about the future wedding and such.

"This chicken is delightful!" Bella complimented, smiling at her soon-to-be mother-in-law.

"Why thank you, Bella," Esme said to her, sending an odd smile towards Edward. "You seem really happy today. Has something good happened?"

"Oh no," Bella told Esme, waving the idea away with her free hand. "I'm just very happy to be here with you all today, eating chicken, telling stories. I haven't done something like this in a long time!"

Rosalie glared at Bella. Edward stared at Alice worriedly. Alice was enjoying the scene, looking impatient. Jasper was staring at the wall across from him. Blankly. Emmett was flexing his muscle, and then poking it with his finger. Carlisle was staring at the rest of the table, curiously. He knew something was up.

Bella put her fork down and announced that she had to go to the bathroom. Edward shot Alice a worried look, but she only smiled knowingly.

When she didn't return for five minutes, the table had grown awkwardly quiet. Edward decided to go and check in on her. She had just opened the door when Edward came to the bathroom door.

"Are you alright?" he asked worriedly.

"Yeah," she answered, zipping up her purse and turning to leave…

…but not, of course, before running into Jasper, whose head shot up and whose eyes glazed over, filling themselves with lust. And not the good kind. Edward, being able to read minds, now knew exactly what Alice had seen. Jasper threw Bella across the hallway and dove for the bathroom and, alas, the garbage can.

He glared down at it with a greedy smile. Inside the garbage can was a little wad of toilet paper. Right now, only a vampire knew what was inside of it.

Jasper reached down and began undoing it like an oddly wrapped ice cream bar with a cottony red center. He shoved it into his mouth and began sucking on it, like a leech on human flesh.

Edward grabbed Jasper by the back of his shirt and yelled for help. Emmett came and held Jasper back as Edward grabbed the garbage can and the bundle and launched them out the window. He turned to Bella who was smiling innocently at him as all this was happening.

"Ow," she exclaimed suddenly, a smile still plastered to her face. She was holding her shoulder, which appeared to be dislocated. "Silly Jasper. He should know not to play rough with me."

"Doesn't that hurt?" Edward asked her wearily, almost fearing the answer.

"Nah," she said, shrugging her one shoulder. "I know pain."

A loud 'clang' followed by an equally loud 'bang' echoed from outside and rang throughout the now silent house.

"I think it's time that we leave," Edward told her, using 'we' instead of 'you.'

**A/N: Yep. That was it. Probably the best chapter of the whole entire story. All because of wonderful Jasper. I'm sorry if that was really gross, but come on.**

You know, my sister and I kind of came up with this story. We were thinking about it, and this scene came to mind. A vampire sucking on some girls tampon. It was hilarious! So I decided to incorporate it into the Twilight u-verse and voila! Hilarity and mayhem!

Tell me your opinions of this chapitre. Did you like it? Hate it? Want to see it burned to the ground? Please, share with me.

Day 6: Recovery  
You've heard the phrase, "nose like a blood hound."


	6. Day 6: Recovery

**Day 6: Recovery**

Bella and Edward were lying in Bella's bed together – completely clothed, mind you – the next day. Bella was embarrassed. The scene that had happened the day before just kept running through her mind.

Bella had her eyes closed and her face buried into Edward's chest. He kept assuring her that everything turned out ok. Other than Jasper's pride and her dislocated shoulder, which Carlisle had put back into place with a painful twist, no one had gotten hurt.

"I was stupid and careless," Bella moaned, looking up at him. "I will never be able to look at your family the same way again."

Edward chuckled. He noticed that her usual frown was returned to her face, and her PMS symptoms were starting to die down. To him, all was well.

That is, until he smelled it. That smell that made him cringe no matter where he was. That smell that dogs get when they're wet. That smell…that smells…smelly. It was then that he realized…that needed to stop watching Spongebob when he was bored.

As if on cue, there was a knock at Bella's front door.

"Jacob." Edward mumbled.

"What?" Bella asked, rubbing her eyes. "Who's at the door?"

"Don't worry, love," he told her, slowly getting up from the bed and making his was downstairs. "I'll answer it."

Bella didn't complain. Charlie wasn't home and she wasn't exactly in the mood to be friendly to visitors.

Edward opened the door and glared at the unwelcome guest, who glared back.

"What do you want?" Edward asked, making sure to keep the screen door closed, a transparent barrier between the two enemies.

"I'm here to see Bella," Jacob answered, folding his arms, muscles tense.

"Who is it?" Bella called from upstairs.

"No one," Edward shouted back. Or at least tried to shout. He doesn't exactly have the loudest voice. It came out more like a mumble.

"It's Jacob!" Jacob yelled into the house, voice considerably louder than the vampire's. The vampire glared at the wolf.

The two heard some sort of 'thump' emanate from the floor above them, and then rushed footsteps as Bella made her way down the stairs.

"Jake!" Bella exclaimed, extremely happy to see her best friend. "You're finally talking to me!"

She pushed passed her vampire lover and opened the screen door, allowing her favorite werewolf to enter the house. As soon as he walked inside, she pulled him into a hug, with Jake making sure to smirk at the other man in the room.

"I heard you were down in La Push the other day," he told her. "And you didn't stop by to say hello."

"You were mad at me, remember," Bella answered.

"Wait," Jacob said suddenly, letting Bella go and then looking at her suspiciously. He sniffed the air. "I smell something."

"I know," Bella said, rolling her eyes. "But Edward has a right to be here too, you know."

"No not that…" he said, his voice trailing off and his eyes narrowing. "It smells like…blood."

Edward and Bella shot each other nervous glances.

"It's your blood, Bella," Jacob snarled, whipping his head towards Edward. "What did you do to her?"

Edward couldn't help but chuckle. Jacob glared at this response.

"This isn't funny!" Jacob yelled, slamming Edward against the wall. "Why can I smell her blood?"

"You can smell her blood because you're a bloody blood hound," Edward retorted cockily, still smiling.

"That's not what I meant and you know it!"

"Why don't you sniff out the source?" Edward asked, raising an eyebrow. "You should be good at it."

Jacob looked at him, curiously. Why was he being so calm about this? If Bella had been injured, shouldn't he have been worried as well? And if she wasn't, why weren't either of them telling him anything?

Jacob crouched down low to the ground and began sniffing the floor, his nose leading him towards the staircase.

"There's," he paused and sniffed again. "There's a distinct trail…somewhere upstairs…"

Jacob glared at Edward for a second time, before making his ascension to the top of the staircase.

"No, Jacob wait!" Bella yelled, trying to stop him, but the stubborn werewolf would not. Edward had to hold her back to prevent her from physically stopping him. He was enjoying this way too much.

Jacob ascended up the stairs, still crawling on the ground like a dog. Eventually, he disappeared out of sight. There was a brief awkward silence between the two remaining people. Edward was waiting patiently for Jacob's future discovery, and Bella was waiting impatiently.

Suddenly, there was a cry from upstairs, followed something following over, and then another brief silence. An unopened tampon came rolling down the stairs. Edward chuckled once more, because sadly, that's all he can do. He's not good with full, robust laughs.

Jacob slowly walked down the stairs with a blank expression on his handsome face. He walked straight up to Bella, but did not look her in the eye. Instead, he said, "I think it's best if I go now."

"But you just got here!" Bella complained, reaching out to touch his hand, but he pulled out reach.

"I think it's best if we returned to talking through notes," he told her, walking to the door. As he reached his escape route, he turned around one more time and said, "You should really change out your garbage can after it begins to overflow. It's not very sanitary."

And then he turned around, and left. The two remaining looked down at his foot, and Edward chuckled once more and Bella gasped at what they saw. Jacob had a used pad stuck to his foot. Bella was sad, and Edward was pleased.

~(8)~

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Spongebob...thank God.**

Uhhhhhh so sorry about not posting this last chapter until now. I didn't realize that I hadn't! I had posted this one on my other site, just not here. Wow. So sorry about that folks!

Jacob made an appearance! Dun da dun da! This was a shout out to all of you wonderful Jacob fans who have been waiting for our favorite werewolf to show up. Unfortunately he showed up at the wrong place at the wrong time. Poor fella.

Tell me what you thought! Was it wonderfully amazing? Terribly awesome? You tell me, my good fans, and I will post the very last chapter of this wonderful ficticious story! Bye bye!

Day 7: Free at Last  
Things can return to normal...pft, yeah right.


End file.
